Arsenal

FILM: Arsenal
DIRECTOR: Steven C. Miller
RATING: 4/10

Arsenal, or as I call it, watch Nicolas Cage ruin a movie that had really great potential. Adrian Grenier turns out a strong performance as a man who would do anything to save his brother, even when it looks like the brother may be setting him up. In any normal circumstance, Adrian can absolutely lead a film. I've seen him do it. But here he is undermined. Actually, in truth, every performance in this film is overshadowed by Nicolas Cage who clearly decided that a hybrid between the characters he played in Vampire's Kiss and Face Off is what this film needed. I blame the director for not reigning him in. And now we're at a crossroads. Who is going to take responsibility and break it to Nicolas Cage that the overacting he did in ConAir is no longer what the people of America want!? Shit is too fucking dramatic in the real world Nic! The people want subtlety now. Truth in their art!! HUMAN TRUTH!!!! Was this a perfect movie otherwise? No. But as is, it's unwatchable.

LaMotta: The Bronx Bull

FILM: Lamotta: The Bronx Bull
DIRECTOR: Martin Guigui
RATING: 6/10

Typically biopics are my least favorite films to watch. They usually feel disjointed and rushed, hurrying to cover a wide scope of the protagonist's life. The endings are always contrived--can you believe he actually learned this important thing at this exact time and it conveniently brought his life great meaning as he himself came full circle!!! And the genre-required old-age makeup is always deadly. I don't usually enjoy biopics and I can't really recall a time that I've ever watched one more than once. But here I am today with LaMotta: The Bronx Bull. Having just watched this movie twice in a row, I'm struggling to express why. It isn't a great film. I didn't love it. It didn't bring me great clarity or illuminate a great truth. In fact, I know nothing about the world of boxing so this film may be an absolute piece of garbage when it comes to facts and history. But from where I sit, it's a portrait of a womanizing boxer who accepts his imperfections, doesn't ever really try to change himself and just lives his life with occasional wins and even more occasional losses. It doesn't feel sugar coated or glamourized--it actually is a really gritty, ugly movie. But I felt like I knew the world a little bit better, and that by the end I had a greater understanding of the man at the center.  Bonus: Cloris Leachman and Penelope Miller showing up in the third act was an unexpected pleasure!

Ouija 3: The Charlie Charlie Challenge (2017)

FILM: Ouija 3: The Charlie Charlie Challenge

DIRECTOR: Derek Presley

RATING: 1/10

Every year I try to see every movie that is released theatrically. Every year I try and I fail miserably. I never even come close. But this is the year I'm going to do it. This is the year I have to do it. Because if I don't do it, I cannot in any way justify watching this film. This film has nothing, and I literally mean nothing, going for it. You know you're in trouble when you think you're watching one thing, but then the movie starts and it's got a completely different title. Charlie Charlie is the name of this film. It has nothing to do with the Ouija franchise. Best I can glean is that there is another franchise called The Ouija Experiment, and this is the third installment of that series, but sneakily without the "The" and the "Experiment" in the title. Save your time and watch literally anything else. Watch paint dry. Be alone with your thoughts. Save yourself. You've been warned.

Bad Sister (1931)

FILM: Bad Sister

DIRECTOR: Hobart Henley

MY RATING: 5/10

Bad Sister offers a glimpse into the life of a young "flirt" played by Sidney Fox, but has the much more esteemed reputation of being Bette Davis's first film. Here, at the tender age of 23, Davis makes her screen debut in the supporting role of Laura. And though you wouldn't know it from Davis's downturned scowl, Laura is actually the good sister in this film. So don't let that incredibly dark look in those occasionally dead eyes fool you! That's not Laura plotting to kill her sister and the rest of the family, it's just Davis finding her sea legs on film for the first time. And because this is her first picture, her self-consciousness is easily spotted. Her inhibitions fill the screen with a too-slow head turn now and again, or stilted, disembodied movements. Convinced her Hollywood career was over, Bette famously left the premiere of this film before the credits rolled. But showing the remarkable resilience that would create a legend, Bette would learn from this role. She would go on to leave Universal who clearly didn't understand her, in turn leaving these good sister roles behind. 

Adulterers (2016)

Film: Adulterers
Director: H.M. Coakley
Genre: Drama
My Rating: (2/10)


The only reason to watch this film, and I mean only, is to witness the train wreck that happens when this level of overacting meets camera work that is so intimate it feels dirty. Sean Faris leaves no pained facial expression unexplored and no extreme mood unswung. What results is a balmy treatise on marriage that is so over the top it feels comical.

Yosemite (2016)

Film: Yosemite

Director: Gabrielle Demeestere

Genre: Indie

Release Date: 1 January 2016

IMDB:

My Rating: (3/10) ★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Understated to a fault, these loosely intertwined vignettes offer much less emotional impact than they seem to be striving for. Left me wondering if James Franco's childhood (upon which the film is based) was as achingly uneventful as the film implies. In a word: snoozecore

The Search for General Tso (2015)

Title: The Search for General Tso
Release Date: 2 January 2015
Directed by: Ian Cheney
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3576038/
My Rating: (7/10) ★★★★★★★☆☆☆

Everywhere, there's a story.