25 November 2016

Adulterers (2016)

Film: Adulterers
Director: H.M. Coakley
Genre: Drama
My Rating: (2/10)

The only reason to watch this film, and I mean only, is to witness the train wreck that happens when this level of overacting meets camera work that is so intimate it feels dirty. Sean Faris leaves no pained facial expression unexplored and no extreme mood unswung. What results is a balmy treatise on marriage that is so over the top it feels comical.

Yosemite (2016)

Film: Yosemite
Director: Gabrielle Demeestere
Genre: Indie
Release Date: 1 January 2016
My Rating: (3/10) ★★★☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Understated to a fault, these loosely intertwined vignettes offer much less emotional impact than they seem to be striving for. Left me wondering if James Franco's childhood (upon which the film is based) was as achingly uneventful as the film implies. In a word: snoozecore

27 December 2015

The Search for General Tso (2015)

Title: The Search for General Tso
Release Date: 2 January 2015
Directed by: Ian Cheney
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3576038/
My Rating: (7/10) ★

Everywhere, there's a story.

30 January 2015

The Boy Next Door (2015)

Title: The Boy Next Door
Release Date: 23 January 2015
Directed by: Rob Cohen
Starring: Jennifer Lopez, Ryan Guzman, Kristen Chenowith
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3181822
My Rating: (2/10) ★

Jennifer Lopez completes her transformation into Scared White Woman. Seriously guys, Jenny from the block would have knocked this kid's teeth out with her chancla. Also Kristen Chenowith stay away from the screen please like bad. I can't believe I saw this on a Friday. 

27 January 2015

Cake (2015)

Title: Cake
Release Date: 23 January 2015
Directed by: Daniel Barnz
Starring: Jennifer Aniston, Adriana Barraza
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3442006
My Rating: (5/10) ★

The most honest thing in this movie is the relationship between Jennifer Aniston's character and her Mexican housekeeper. Adriana Barraza gives an honest, truthful performance. Jennifer Aniston shows the side of herself we've always known she's hiding. 

Strange Magic (2015)

Title: Strange Magic
Release Date: 23 January 2015
Directed by: Gary Rydstrom
Starring: Evan Rachel Wood, Kristen Chenowith, Elijah Kelley, Alan Cumming
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4191054
My Rating: (3/10) ★

May qualify as child abuse in some states. 

20 January 2015

American Sniper (2014)

Title: American Sniper
Release Date: 25 December 2014
Directed by: Clint Eastwood
Starring: Bradley Cooper, Sienna Miller
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2179136
My Rating: (4/10) ★

Master manipulator Clint Eastwood tries to ruin Christmas.